Dance Etiquette Tips
by Erik Novoa
www.SwingsShoes.net
Want
to maximize your time on the dance floor? Here are some tips to get you
through the night:
1)
ASK PEOPLE'S NAME. It's much easier to
ask someone to dance if you actually know their name (duh!!).
2)
DEODORANT & MOUTHWASH. You'd be
surprised to know that the #1 reason why people don't want to dance with
other people is because of the way they smell. If someone offers you a
mint or a piece of gum, take it, or at least assume that they're trying
to tell you something. It's better to be safe than sorry. Allergic
to perfumes and colognes? Partner dancing is going to be tough...consult
your physician.
3)
CORRECTING YOUR PARTNER. I hear about this
allllll the time. It's simple, don't correct your partner. If your
partner wants your advice, they'll ask you for it. Don't assume that they
want to learn from you...especially during the middle of a dance. If you
want to let someone know the secret of that special move you know, ASK
them if they'd like you to show it to them AFTER the dance.
4)
HOW LONG DO I HAVE TO DANCE WITH HIM/HER? Realistically, you
only have to bear with each other for about 4 minutes (avg. length of a
song). If you mutually enjoyed the dance, you can do another but it's
safe to walk away after one ride. If you're new or shy, you can always
ask someone to dance the final 2/3 of a song by saying "would you
like to finish this song?". Since you're only dancing for one
song....trying smiling...it makes it more enjoyable for both people. Both
people should say thank you at the end of the ride...whether you liked it
or not.
5)
DECLINING A DANCE. This is tough!! Eye
contact is 90% of the game. Avoiding eye contact is a polite way of
avoiding being asked. Polite excuses (bathroom, tired, thirsty etc)
usually works too. But since it's a social environment, try to ask the
person who you formerly declined; it's good for Karma. If you find
yourself being declined a lot, try engaging in small conversation before
asking someone to dance. See advice #1-3 above.
If
somebody asks you to dance and you decline the dance, and somebody else
asks you to do the same dance, that person should be turned down as well,
unless you had that dance "reserved" in addition. This can also
come in handy if you want to decline somebody else. You can always say
"I'm sorry, I just turned somebody else down".
6)
HOW TO ASK FOR A DANCE. You've learned all the
steps but you can't get on the floor without asking someone to dance.
Summon up up your courage and learn these simple words, "Would you
like to dance? or May I have this dance? or May I have the
pleasure?" Men - Step up to the plate and ask others to dance...it's
very flattering. Women - Don't think that it's the man's job to be the
only one to ask...if you want to dance, learn how to ask too. It's goes
both ways! (refer back to tip #1 and #2 as easy ways to feel more
comfortable approaching other people).
7)
COLLISIONS. If someone bumps into
you, a wink or acknowledgement or a simple "Sorry" is all that
is needed. It does not matter who is in the wrong.
8)
DANCE CLASS LEVEL. A beginner should
obviously take a beginner lesson. However many times an
intermediate/advanced dancer of another dance may want to jump into the
intermediate/advanced class of another dance. This is a mistake. All
dances are different, with different names of steps and different
lead-follow concepts. Hustle is different from West Coast Swing, which is
different from Lindy Hop, which is different from Ballet. If you are new
to a dance (even if you are a champion dancer in a another form), please
start from the beginning. Chances are, if you start from the beginning
you will progress more quickly.
It
is also polite to take the beginner class if you're taking a class with
an instructor with whom you are unfamiliar. If you are truly an
intermediate dancer, the beginner class gives you an opportunity to work
on some basics which might be particular to the instructor. It also gives
you the opportunity to work on your form. If you're truly an intermediate
dancer, the instructor will notice your fluidity of movement and
understanding of the dance.
How
do you know if you're ready to move on to the next level? Generally, you
should have an understanding of the names of the movements, are able to
lead/follow the basic elements and you know how many counts for the
respective steps....then you can begin to move on...provided that you
aren't holding up the majority of the class. If you happen to be asked
not to participate or to "just watch"...don't feel bad. It's
not personal (you're not bad and it isn't the teacher trying to make you
feel inferior). An instructor is responsible for the safety and effective
learning of the entire class. Sometimes it's best to have someone watch
instead of participate because it might risk other's learning experience.
A student shows disrespect to other dancers, the teacher and him/herself
when trying to jump into a level that is beyond their current ability.
Don't lose heart, in due time (everyone is different), most students
progress naturally into the intermediate and advanced classes.
9)
LATE TO CLASS. If you're late to
class...think of it as being late to a business meeting. First, ask
permission of the instructor if you can join in late. Just because you
flew in from Rome, got stuck in traffic and had to look for parking does
not entitle you to be admitted to class. An instructor needs to guide a
class with uniformity and continuity. Being late interrupts the flow of
class especially since the latecomer has already missed critical material
previously taught prior to his/her arrival. If you are allowed to jump
into class, be extra attentive...you have just become the weakest link
and you're expected to catch up fast.
(As
with tip #8) If you happen to be asked not to participate or to
"just watch"...don't feel bad. It's not personal (you're not
bad and it isn't the teacher trying to make you feel inferior). An
instructor is responsible for the safety and effective learning of the
entire class. Sometimes it's best to have someone watch instead of
participate because it might risk other's learning experience. A student
shows disrespect to other dancers, the teacher and him/herself when
arriving late to class and taking it upon him/herself to just trying to
jump in. Remember, always check with the instructor.
10)
DRESS ATTIRE. I know this might come as a
surprise: guys should generally not wear shorts for social dancing
(either the class or the party). Leave the tank top at home or at least
wear it as an undergarment, but don't think that your partner wants to
lather up in your sweat (see #13). Women - if you're going to wear a
dress (long or short), please wear dance-shorts underneath. You'd be
amazed how much you show when you are given a double turn...and even
though the guys might appreciate your gratuitous exposure, other people
might remember you for something which you might want to forget.
11)
FOOTWEAR. Bring different types of shoes for your day/night of
dancing. Since floors can have a wide range of speeds, bring different
footwear to accommodate this issue. Guys - Please DO NOT wear tevas,
flip-flops (unless you've won the US Open), or Birkenstocks...it simply
looks horrible and it's insulting to your female partner who might have
spent hours making her feet look appropriate for open toed high
heels.
12)
WARMING UP. After signing in,
changing your shoes and ordering your favorite drink, please warm up.
Even if you are taking a beginner class, your body will be challenged in
movement. There are good chances that your day at work, at home, or in
the car has not prepared your feet, ankles, knees, hips and back for
movement. Most importantly, injuries suck! Spraining a body-part due to
lack of a simple warm up can prevent you from having fun for a couple of
weeks. If you need some warm up ideas, please ask your instructor.
13)
SWEATING. It's true...we all sweat. Some sweat more than
others. Nothing is a bigger turn off than dancing with someone who is wet
and slippery. I've seen people turn down their best friends because they
didn't want to go for a "swim". There are 2 major suggestions that
usually make all these types of problems subside:
#1
- Bring a small towel to the dances. You can either use the towel to dry
off or to wash up in the bathroom (splash cool water on your face and
wrists to fool your body that's it's cooler than it really is).
#2
- Bring a change of shirt. I know a lot of dancers who carry 2 or 3
shirts with them so that they can always feel dry and look cool.· And
here's my own wacky tip: try an undershirt. Although it might seem that
the extra layer would make you warmer, the undershirt tends to absorb
moisture before the outer layer. Of course, you'll have to refer to Tip
#2 if you soak through your outer layer.
14)
COUGHING AND SNEEZING. Coughing or sneezing
into one's own hands can seem polite, but it's almost the worst thing you
can do. Partner dancing has a lot of hand-to-hand contact which makes
anything on your hands transmissible. If you have to cough or sneeze in
class or in a social setting, do so into your elbow. If anything happens
near your hands, please go and wash them thoroughly. Ask for some
antibacterial hand sanitizer if a sink is not close.
I
recently had a student to was constantly coughing into his hand, then he
extended that hand for a handshake, I shook his hand then ran to the
bathroom to wash my hands. Moments later, he coughed and covered
again...then re-shook my hand as he left. I had to wash my hands
again.
15)
SAYING "HELLO" TO THE HOST.
Some people attend local dances and do not say "hello" to the
host. This can easily be considered rude or an offence to the host.
Please remember that the host has gone to great lengths to create a fun
and social environment. The host may be busy during your immediate moment
of entry and you should make every effort to exchange pleasantries.
Please see a full commentary about Saying "Hello" to the Host.
Editor's
Note: Reprinted with permission
from Erik Novoa, www.swingshoes.net. You can see Erik
and his lovely wife, Anna, in action at Swing Fling in
early August!
